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"Humans are relatively flexible species," Michael R.Cunningham, Ph D, a psychologist in the department of communications at the University of Louisville, tells Web MD. You can override a lot of biology in pursuit of other goals." Interestingly, Cunningham did an unpublished study of 60 women in their 20s, 30s, and 40s, who were shown pictures of men aged to those decades. We should marry people within two years of our age.If the voltages are different, one becomes the pursuer and one the distancer.
The women like the flexibility and sense of adventure of their more spontaneous, younger companions, Tina B.
Tessina, Ph D, a licensed family therapist in practice in Long Beach, Calif., and author of The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again, tells Web MD.
For their part, the men like the sophistication and life success of their older mates, she explains.
"What you don't want," she explains, "is one partner wanting to go out, the other stay in; one willing to talk, the other wanting space (and silence to enjoy it)." Susan Winter is co-author, with Felicia Brings, of Older Women, Younger Men: New Options for Love and Romance.
She has been in several relationships with men up to 20 years younger than herself.