Anxiety over online dating
As with Twitter, Facebook, Linked In, and email, I checked it compulsively with the hope that some exciting notification would greet me on the homepage. I also realized that when I used Tinder, I was swiping compulsively to try to find out who my "super likes" were, often not even reading profiles.
I was just looking for fun and maybe a hookup, not a relationship.
During the times I slipped on my hiatus and went on OKCupid, I realized I felt a sense of dread as the homepage loaded because I associated the site with disappointment and rejection.
I hadn't even noticed these feelings before because they were overridden by the hope that I'd get that rare good message.
" I projected confidence, and I wasn't willing to settle.
Seeing that contrast made me realize how nervous and desperate to please I'd been in the past. While nervous people come off like they have something to be nervous about, confident people come off like they have something to be confident about—and others want to know what that something is.7. " Because I hadn't experienced this thought process in a while, I caught it very early on and was able to say, "Down, girl. I put up with people I shouldn't have Getting more comfortable being single helped me see what lengths I'd gone to in order to avoid singledom.
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Of course, nothing about me had changed, so this line of reasoning didn't actually make any sense.